When a clinical psychologist and renowned expert on P.A.C.E and therapeutic parenting emailed me with some comments on my original P.A.C.E. Poster (now removed to avoid confusion), I listened. Kim Golding thanked me for raising the profile of PACE and had some thoughts as to how to improve it and where I might have misunderstood the principles. She generously gave her time and ideas to update and rephrase some of the words and images, and also sent me a copy of her book to read.

Being a goody two-shoes type, I digitally recreated a New Improved poster, because editing the handdrawn version took four hours. The core principles remain the same (note: these are my interpretations of these four principles):

• Playfulness – having a light-hearted attitude
• Acceptance – unconditional acceptance of the child, if not their behaviour
• Curiosity – using “I wonder” statements to help them express and explore their feelings
• Empathy – matching and mirroring their emotional state to help them feel understood

But PACE is not a strategy to change behaviour (as Kim wrote in her email):

rather it is a way of being (an attitude) which helps mistrusting children to feel more secure. When PACE is used as a strategy, the acceptance is lost.

This version of the PACE poster draws on the following books that I have personally read:

• Creating Loving Attachments; Parenting with PACE to Nurture Confidence and Security in the Troubled Child, by Kim S Golding and Daniel A Hughes
• Everyday Parenting with Security and Love; Using PACE to Provide Foundations for Attachments by Kim S Golding

Kim would also recommend the following books if you would like to find out more:

• Attachment Focused parenting, by Dan Hughes
• Building the Bonds of Attachment (3rd ed) by Dan Hughes

Donate and Download

This poster has taken a great deal of time and effort to produce, so please make a donation before downloading it. If you want an A3 poster version, get in touch using the link below or comments box to order one.

Individuals for Private Use ONLY: Please leave a donation (to Red500 Ltd using paypal) before downloading a high quality PDF version of the new improved PACE poster here.

Schools and Organisations: Please contact me to purchase the rights to print a poster for your walls, for handouts or other uses.

Please do not distribute without prior permission or host this image on your website.